Monday, May 2, 2011

I know, that now I commit errors, but I hope, that you will not be becomes angry.

Of course you have.  Are you such stupid?

And what do preposterous statements of broken English bordering on the abilities of a 3 year old mean?  That’s right Natalya is back!  I’m not going to argue with her that I swear I now have pictures of 3 different women but who can argue with this fine lady?  Plus, she’s on some sort of useless pumpkin coach in her latest photo, I have no idea where the teddy bear is.

It turns out, she doesn’t really read my questions.  She didn’t even check out my calves because she didn’t pass out from awesomeness.  So here’s what she wrote (she’s a bit of a chatter box today).  I ran 12.5 miles yesterday.  Give me a prize. 

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Hello Jonah !

I am very happy to receive the letter from you today. I - very much happy, that All of you still have, desire to write to me. It is very good, that my answer about volume that I live in Russia does not confuse you. Your country seems to me very interesting and certainly differs from my. I like to learn all new.  We live far apart... It is very big distance for both of us. But it the distance only seems big. It at all does not frighten me. It seems to me especially interesting. Unless you do not think so?

I read in the newspaper (it was during long time back) that in other countries (Europe and the North America) meets a situation, that women are more careless than men. Whether it is valid truly? I very much would like to study your opinion, Also, why you search for the woman on the Internet? I - for the first time I have acquaintance through the Internet. Now I wish to tell to you about me directly. I never was married, and I wish to marry. I want, to meet someone who wants to have an amicable and strong family. I require someone who is fair, also It is careful, warm and sexual.

I wish to have the friend who later (if all is correct), could to become the friend is more than only. The most important parts of relations - love, trust and understanding. These three things should be present together. The love is important, but you should to trust blindly to other person, If really love it because you should know its real love - you, it is final you.

You probably have a question "why the Russian women search for husbands in other countries”.

As from many reasons, I think, and first of all - an economic level of Russia. The Russian men cannot care of their family. They are very lazy. They drink much and at times very roughly concern women and a family, I do not want such future. If they receive many money, anyhow they also start to spend everything to drink alcohol or on other women. In our country of women it is more than men. Russian women operate housekeeping, lift children and has a permanent job at the same time.

There is an opinion that the Russian men degrade now. I wish to marry abroad as I am interested in my future. I wish to have a usual, quiet life though I should leave my friends and Culture. It is very difficult. Here only a few reasons, why I - still one, I think, that it is better to be lonely than to be with someone and to be the unfortunate. I have no children, but I would like to have them. I think, that I would be good mother. I live with the parents, mum and the daddy, at us very amicable family. My mum call - Svetlana, to it of 50 years and it very much worry that I ones . But it completely supports me in my opinion about to family. My daddy - Vladimir to it 53. It the real man also is always ready to come on the help in any situation.

I like to visit cinema and to read books. I have much free times after my work, therefore I have possibility to read. I love various love stories, detectives and very much, very much I love the classical Russian literature. Also I love various music. When to me it is sad, I listen to slow, sensual music.  Jazz and blues. When I have good mood, I listen to modern music. The American music, very pleasant to me Jeniffer Lopez, Aerosmith, Moby and other American groups. In the winter I go, to ski and the fads.  That you like to do at leisure.

My hobby if probably to tell so - English language. I loved English language during long time when I studied in to school. The training program necessarily includes a foreign language in Russia, as rule - English language, the German or the French language. I have entered English group language and I am still happy, that I have made it. After school, I continued to study English language at institute. I know, that now I commit errors, but I hope, that you will not be becomes angry.

I wait your answer Jonah.  I have many ideas about which I will write in following letters. I send you my photos and I will look forward your photos.

Your friend Natalya.

So after taking a half day to read all that junk – including this business about the pleasant American music such as Jeniffer Lopez and Moby – I wrote back. 

Hello my Friend Natalya. 

Hello, is it me you’re looking for?

Thank you again for the photo and lovely but sadly letter.  I search for women on the internet frequently, I find many but most are just pictures and not real people I think – many good videos too.

I have no doubt Russian men are as you say: cannot care of their family, they are very lazy, they drink much and at times very roughly concern women and a family, and they receive many money, they also start to spend everything to drink alcohol or on other women.  Actually, these men sound like American women.  That whole part about spending everything on drinking and women does not sound too bad too me, but I depends upon many other factors like: is tomorrow a work day, am I behind the wheel right now and should I be watching the kids or are these roller skates on my feet and how did they get there or do I know this woman is a woman?

You sound like a lovely woman and I can appreciate the lifting of children.  As a male nurse I do a lot of lifting, if you haven’t noticed sick people are generally in bed, laying down and being lazy.  Do you want children and a family?  I do very much but more so with a partner who desires such things as children.  Do you have any pets?  A dog or cat perhaps?  I am interested in your thoughts and generally assassination of my language. 

I like your carriage, where was this photo taken?  Perhaps you have more pictures – you always look different but very pretty.  I think you might want another hobby, other than English.  It’s not really a hobby – I’m guessing you maybe have other talents?  I look forward to you ignoring most of my questions. I suppose it is still winter and you’re likely off to the ski or the fads.

Do you travel?  I am going to visit Paris this summer, would you possibly be interested in meeting me there? 

Warm regards and sweaters,

Jonah.

3 comments:

Anne said...

Ha ha ha hah a!!! You're still chatting with your mail order brides! Ha! I love it. I can't get enough. Your letter had me in tears! Ahhhhh Lorpeedo....you're the bomb!

Thanks for the laughs
Anne

Kira said...

Rhymes with schmucking hilarious!!!

Kira said...

Rhymes with shmucking awesome!! Hilarious!!