Friday, August 13, 2010

Cowboys Don’t Drive Miatas

It’s true, try searching on Bing or Google or anywhere to find a picture of a guy driving a Miata with a cowboy hat. 

Except I went to go see Rush the other day with The G and we saw a cowboy driving a Miata.  And I said that I don’t think that the universe would agree with that sort of thing.

Then I saw Rush, which if you’re a girl person – you probably don’t know it’s a band or if you do, you couldn’t name more than 1-2 songs by them.  I sort of thought that they would be universally liked, not like say… Coldplay or some gender friendly band, but more than Motley Crue (which I’ve seen and it was AWESOME). 

The G said I should do a top 10 things you’d see at a Rush concert but I get all itchy when she tells me what I should do with MY site, so this is my idea and not hers because I think I’m always thinking ‘I should write about this’ but I don’t.  So really, she is just my way of remembering things and not my inspiration for this. 

So here’s the Top 10 things you’d see at a Rush concert (and since MOST of you are women reading this, it’s probably handy for you to know because I doubt you’d ever see them):

  1. The lines OUT of the men’s room is about 10x longer than the one in the women’s room. 
  2. About 40% of the audience is compelled to play air guitar, air bass or air drums throughout the entire show, it was really quite a workout for some (see #3)
  3. About 80% of the audience is fatter than hell.  Like, I can rest my arms, my nachos and a lunch tray on my stomach when seated.  For the 3 women other than The G who went, they did not need bras because they had their stomachs to hold up their equipment.
  4. Like flying coach, the crowd at Rush feel compelled to fart throughout the show.  I would have rather experienced 2nd hand smoke all night vs concert ass.
  5. A lot of tire/auto parts customer service people. 
  6. Like church, I’m thinking the thoughtful and meaningful lyrics to the songs are lost on 98% of the audience.  The other 2% were stuck waiting in the men’s room line (see #1). 
  7. Seeing a guy with a black concert t-shirt, long hair, earrings, and tattoos who is tailgating out of the back of his Volvo with Merlot and fruit salad isn’t odd it’s just a Rush concert.
  8. $6 Lattes.  With a line as long as the men’s room line, except it has 2 of the 3 women at the show waiting.
  9. Because of #3 and #2 (sorry I should have made this #5), people are exhausted by the 3rd song and have to sit for 2-3 songs at a time.  This was nice because I don’t like standing very much, if I did I would work at the Gap or at Red Robin.  I think the band specifically builds their set list to accommodate the lack of fitness required to accompany the band with air-based instruments.  Think intervals or farleks but for the out of shape auto parts team from NAPA (the store, not the wine region of California). 
  10. Even if you didn’t like them, you’d say this was one of the best concerts you’ve ever seen, or you’d just say that so you could get a ride home from a cowboy driving a Miata.


Mom of the Mud Puddle said...

I am fairly certain I am the only 'regular' girl I know who loves Rush. And you were spot on with your assessment by the way. I once got knocked over by a guy 'playing' a solo on his air guitar.

Kathleen @ ForgingAhead said...

I would have been the fourth woman at the concert if I knew they were awesome live. Now that I know I'll have to check their Bay Area schedule and go!

Kathleen @ ForgingAhead said...

Crumb - they were here August 9th. Missed out.

peggi said...

I was the girl at the show last nite and am STILL laughing at the line for the men's room!